An increasingly common phone act is actually a relationship red flag, study finds

Experts are warning that a worrying “red flag” relationship has become normalized after new data revealed it is on the rise in Australia.

Almost a quarter of Australians think it’s reasonable to expect to have a partner’s device codes and more than one in 10 think it’s reasonable to expect to track a partner using location-sharing apps, the research found new eSafety conducted by the Center for Social Research.

“There are many practical and safe reasons why two people in an intimate relationship might agree to share their passcodes, track each other, or send frequent messages to check where the other person is or what they are doing, ” eSafety Commissioner Julie. Inman Grant said.

“What is troubling about these findings is the normalization of these expectations within any intimate relationship.”

“In this age of ubiquitous technology, we must be careful not to inadvertently erode a partner’s privacy, boundaries, and agency simply because digital devices allow us to track, control, and review their every move, their likes and dislikes .

Of the 2,046 respondents, just under 10 percent of respondents agreed that both having someone’s personal codes and tracking someone whenever they want using location-sharing apps were reasonable expectations of an intimate partner .

It also found that men were twice as likely as women to view a partner’s stalking as “reasonable” or a “sign of caution”.

“When there are some red flags, it could be that you or someone you know is a target of technology-based coercion,” added Inman Grant.

“Technology-based coercive control is not a single act of abuse, but a pattern of controlling behaviors. It is often difficult to distinguish because the abuser will describe their abusive actions as acts of care or deep concern. But as a wolf in sheep’s clothing, this is abuse dressed as love.

“While we need to conduct further research to understand what drives these attitudes and expectations, it is clear that more work needs to be done to raise awareness of technology-based coercive control and reshape norms around digital privacy. and respect between intimate partners, especially between adults and younger men.â€

Inman Grant added that the data exposed the gravity of gender-based violence facilitated by technology, which had been underestimated or ignored for “too long”.

“This form of violence acts as a ‘silent threat’ to women and their children,” she said.

“Although there may not be visible bruising, it can leave deep psychological trauma and scars.”

One of the reasons it’s so dangerous is because it can “seep into every digital nook and cranny of a victim’s life and be used to ‘terrify and manipulate.’

“When it comes to technology-based coercive control, the tentacles of abuse are many and insidious because its vectors are the devices we use every day, carry everywhere and have in every room of our homes,” she warned.

“We know from frontline workers that technology-based coercive control is almost always used in family, domestic and sexual violence, but is often only apparent after the abuser has infiltrated every digital nook and cranny.

“At that point, the victim is in a position of almost certain danger without expert support from a frontline service. And the victims are mostly women and their children, including young people in their first or early relationships.â€

The warning comes after New South Wales introduced stricter probation and parole laws to protect survivors of domestic violence on July 1.

Coercive control can manifest in a variety of ways and is associated with a pattern of behavior that may include financial and emotional abuse, violence and intimidation, threats to pets or loved ones, tracking someone’s movements or isolating them from family and friends.